Okay, so you’ve finally done it. You bit the dating bullet, you signed up to a site and you are ready to rock and roll…well, at least to go out and meet some equally like-minded individuals who also like long walks on the beach and strolls in the park. Wait, what, you didn’t just write that cliché statement on your dating profile did you?
And this is where it all starts to get tricky. Once you are over the initial daunting hurdle of actually signing up to a site, you then have to write your profile. And while your dating profile might at first glance seem like a very simplistic task, it’s not.
Your dating profile is a window to you. It’s the first view that a potential suitor sees, and it’s the first time someone assesses if you’re a likely candidate for a date. Your profile is much more important than you may have realised at first glance. Get the wording right, and you’ll be answering emails as quickly as your sister can say ‘he took you where!’.
So here are a few things to think about as you begin writing your dating profile:
- Don’t be too brief, and don’t write a novel: You definitely want to let people know a little bit about you but be careful of the two extremes. Make sure you don’t answer a question with just two or three word answers, but equally, no one wants to know your whole story before they’ve even met you.Plan what you want to say before you write it. List all the things you can thing of and then remove all the non essentials. Keep your answers punchy, but interesting. ‘I am a really fun-loving person and all my friends think that I am the life and soul of the party!’ Can be easily changed to: ‘I am fun-loving and like to party!’ That’s 21 words reduced to 7, but says pretty much the same thing. Tell a story if it’s relevant, but make sure it’s snappy. Short and simple is the best. And like all good marketing action, use a call-to-action i.e. encourage them to get in touch.
- Consider the photo that best represents who you are: The amount of complaints you hear [from people on first online dates] about how the photo their date had used turned out to be the ten year younger version of them is astounding. Why lie to someone who is considering asking you out and more importantly, why lie to yourself. Be confident and proud of who you are now and what you look like. You can share the best version of you while still being truthful.Okay so we don’t always look like Julia Roberts, but what a fantastic photo of her as an example. She is smiling and joyful; this lady seems fun and sensitive at the same time. Remember your photo is about showing you. Does your photo reflect the fun, sweet, thoughtful person you are? And if you play a certain sport, or have a certain crazy hobby, why not put a picture of you doing that up there too so people with similar interests who stumble upon your profile might think, “oh hey, they like the same sports I like”.And no matter what you might think, a photo is always better than no photo. People with photos on their profile are much more likely to asked out (and for example that’s also why we ask for a picture). Fact!
- Know your audience: If you decide to go on a site that is largely targeting a younger, playful, and carefree audience, then you’ll need to tailor your profile to suit. Alternatively if you have chosen a site known for getting couples together long-term, then your profile probably won’t want to scream I love drinking till 1am every night. What do you want to say about yourself? And more importantly, what do people want to know about you as soon as they click your page?
- Save your best bits for the date: Entice your readers with a few lovely and quirky statements and facts about yourself, but save the best bits for the date. Trust me, you want to be surprised and delighted. And that means you don’t want to know everything before you’ve even eaten your entrée. And hey, that goes for the first date too.
- Spell check everything! Nothing worse than spending all that time coming up with clever little anecdotes only to get the wrodnig wrong J
So ladies and gentlemen, go confidently in the direction of your first date knowing you put your best photo forward, and saved your best moment for that first date. And in parting, what wise words from Thomas Fuller “Choose a wife rather by your ear than by your eye.”